You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
