i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Just invented taco cereal.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
