Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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