Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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