So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
