i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
