In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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