I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
