she looked like the bat from fern gully.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
