well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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