You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
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