is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize