I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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