I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Its about making memories worth repressing
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
