Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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