was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
