Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
