He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
