i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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