When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
All the doctor said was why
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize