I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
