He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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