Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Randomize