so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
