is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize