What did we do last night that was yellow?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
