In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
