If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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