Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
