Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize