I can't watch pbs sober anymore
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i believe in u and ur pee
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
