I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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