rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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