Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
