one might say we're banned from that church
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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