glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
