TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
