sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
