He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
