How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize