i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
