Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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