yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
