I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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