Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize