quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
