so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
