why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
