I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
