Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
