have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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